Perception is everything, isn't it?
As a kid, I used to wonder if what I saw as blue looked the same to everyone. Maybe what I identified as blue actually looked like what I identified as red to someone else. This unanswerable question used to drive me nuts with wondering. It's really impossible to know exactly what another person is thinking. Preconception and bias play a part in everything.
Now those questions are a bit different, more grown-up, but really - the same.
How do you see me? As a willing participant in a fiery affair? As the woman who you would be with, and happily, were there no other ties in your life? As the girl who won't let go?
The answer isn't really that important - not in the grand scheme of things. We're happy with things as they are and neither of are interested in changing our circumstances right now.
I just wonder...
Oh, what a tangled web we weave…
1 year ago
8 comments:
I completely understand this post.
It is so hard not to wonder how people view our lives, choices and feelings. Especially when we start to embrace sides of ourselves that we had never shared with anyone before.
But you are totally right, it isn't really that important what anyone else thinks.
For the record, I think you rock!
My dad used to quote someone and say "What a gift the great God gee us, to see ourselves as others see us."
I see you (understnad that I have only read a few of your posts, I don't have time to travel back to the beginning of your blog) as a incredibly sexy, savvy and smart woman whose husband has checked out of the marriage and left you no choice but to take your desires elsewhere. His loss, but I still think it's very unfortunate.
that's a hard one, hey? we just never really know what others think. even when we think we know...like with a lover, sometimes we're wrong. i have to get to know you better to understand your circumstance. thanks for visiting my blog. i'm really late getting here, but i'll be back. :)
As Socrates wrote: "The life unexamined is not worth living." We bloggers are doing just fine in that regard. I love reading what you write.
The philosopher's dilemma of perception... I looked in a mirror I walked past just after reading this, and could not help but wonder 'what is it DL sees when I walk by? What is it my husband sees? what does that random group of people see?' We are different things to many different people. We can never be everything to any one person. Maybe that realization dropped us in the middle of our affairs?
@Gray: it's hard to *not* wonder how others see us and sometimes even harder not to care - but I'm thrilled you think I rock!
@Jane: I couldn't agree more - it is unfortunate, and his loss. And thank you for the kind compliment!
@Autumn: I look very much forward to reading your thoughts! Thanks!
@13messages: We sure are - ours are lives very well examined! (I love your blog too!)
@Topaz: I think you might be onto something with that thought. I also think that some people simply won't let you be everything to them, if that makes any sense.
Perception is a big deal in a relationship. What one partner sees as non-disclosure, the other sees as lying.
@Trooper Thorn: ...and that's the bitch of it, isn't it? Thanks for stopping by!
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